And for a little light relief!

Life would be much better if we lived it backwards.
You'd start out dead and get it out of the way.
Then, wake up in an old people's home feeling better every day.
You get kicked out for being too healthy; collect your pension and then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day.
You work 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement.
You drink alcohol, you party, you're generally promiscuous and you get ready to start school.
You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a baby.
You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in spa-like conditions; central heating, room service on tap.
And then you finish off as an orgasm.

I rest my case!