Message from your Prime Minister--
you mean Peter Mandel son....?
Dear People of the United Kingdom
Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown of the
economy, your Government has decided to implement a scheme to put
workers 50 years of age and older on early retirement.
This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).
Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the government to be
eligible for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination).
Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under
the SCREW program (Scheme Covering Retired Early Workers).
A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED
as many times as the government deems appropriate.
Only persons who have been RAPED can get AIDS (Additional Income
for Dependants & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired
Personnel Early Severance). Obviously, persons who have AIDS or HERPES
will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the government.
Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on, will receive as much SHIT
(Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The government has
always
prided itself in the amount of SHIT it gives
out. Should you feel that
you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of
your local MP. They have been trained to give you all the SHIT
you can handle.
Sincerely,
Gordon Brown......? Peter Mandel....son
you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of
your local MP. They have been trained to give you all the SHIT
you can handle.
Sincerely,
Gordon Brown......? Peter Mandel....son
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