And worser - by Richard... Wednesday, May 12, 2010

And worser - by Richard... Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Cleggeron High Command has announced the appointment of Kenneth Clarke as Justice Secretary and Lord Chancellor, and Theresa May as Home Secretary and minister for women and equality.

A further communiqué is being translated. 

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It gets worse - by Richard...

With the appointment if Chris Huhne as energy and climate change secretary, the "not-the-Conservative Party" has morphed into the "not-the-Conservative government". 

The unelected leader of the unelected Cleggerons is to announce more appointments today. Already, he has confirmed that former News of the World editor, the unelected Andy Coulson, will be the voice of the Cleggerons. His first message is being prepared. 

The unelected foreign secretary Mr Hague confirmed that the High Command intends to introduce fixed-term parliaments, with – he says - the next election to be held on the first Thursday of May 2015.

That is, of course, unless the whole damn edifice collapses before then, which can't come soon enough.

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"We have ... to rebuild trust" - by Richard...

So, the leader of the Cleggerons (now with his own website - cleggerons.com) beams into No 10 after all. I got that wrong – totally and completely. I never thought that a Conservative Party could make a formal alliance with the Libdims. But then, I should have remembered that this is the "not-the-Conservative Party".

Bizarrely, it seems, it was Brown's own parliamentary party which rejected the idea of a Lib-Lab pact, MPs and ministers attacking it as a bad idea that was always doomed to failure. Hence, once negotiations started up, the Lib-Dim delegation got the bum's rush and went rushing back to the bosom of the Tories. 

This gave The Boy his victory, gained not through his own negotiating skills or his "success" at the ballot box but handed to him on a plate by the Labour party which still has some residual scruples.

Not so the "not-the-Conservative Party", which then had the Cleggeron leader in his first speech telling us, "One of the tasks we have is to rebuild trust in the political system". As leader of an unnatural, unelected coalition – which has not yet declared the terms of its coalition – he has to be freekin' joking.

Just to add to the joke, little Georgie Osborne is chancellor of the exchequer. Hague is foreign secretary ... to join the unelected prime minister. That, we are told, should reassure the party. And the cleggie as deputy prime minister has yet to be confirmed.

And so it all starts. It is some 70 years since we last saw a coalition government, set up as Hitler launched "Operation Yellow" on the mainland, an operation which was to culminate in our retreat to Dunkirk and evacuation, and the start of the Battle for Britain. How things have changed. Then, we were reliant on the "few". Now, one might say, never in the field of human endeavour is so little owed by so many to so few.

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'Tis done - the Cleggerons rule - by Richard... Tuesday, May 11, 2010

All Hail the Cleggerons! Gordon Brown has submitted his resignation to the Queen. We knew the end must be close when the BBC wheeled out David Dimbleby and a new Conservative anthemwas abroad.

Tory Boy blog was predicting that The Boy would be prime minister "by tomorrow morning", so it just had to be true. The impossible has happened – two totally incompatible parties have come together, united in one thing only, their yearning for the trappings of power. And, for that, the Cleggerons will agree to change the voting system to something not one in a hundred actually want, or even care a shit about.

If they go ahead with a referendum on a new system, this will cement in the ultimate farce – a vote on something we don't want instead of a genuine vote on the Lisbon treaty.

Another farcical aspect is the Tory prattling about a "strong, stable government", when the regime will be anything but. And nor will this alliance reflect or represent anything like the whole nation. Cameron managed a dismal 23.5 percent of the popular vote – a mandate this most certainly is not.


Dave's "not-the-Conservative Party" is to be allied with a Europhile party in a fornal coalition, headed by a man many would rather eviscerate than vote for - who now becomes deputy prime minister. These two parties conjoined, both contributing cabinet ministers, are an alien construct which lacks moral authority, respect or anything approaching majority approval.

The Cleggerons may enjoy their brief moment of glory – but the honeymoon will be short. Their reign, we hope, will not last much longer.

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Thick, or what? - by Richard...

I had to listen to it twice, just to make sure I hadn't got it wrong. But yes, William Hague did tell the assembled media that "we" – presumably the Conservative Party – believe "very firmly in an elected prime minister".

This is from the author of the stunning slogan, "in Europe but not ruled by Europe", demonstrating beyond peradventure that, if Master Hague is not terminally thick, then he is something even worse.

Once again ... in this country, we do not elect prime ministers. We elect MPs. Political parties then decide on their leaders and the majority party – if there is one – recommends a candidate to the Queen. It is the Queen, then, who appoints the prime minister (and, indeed, all the other ministers).

That Hague can't seem to learn this simple lesson puts him in the same league as Tories – like Cameron – who seem to believe that you can promise a referendum on the Lisbon Treaty and then walk away from that promise without an electoral penalty.

We don't expect our politicians to be geniuses, but this lot is so thick they don't deserve even to live, much less form a government.

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A howl of impotent rage - by Richard...

Just looking at the collection of front pages from the media today tells its own story. Not only have the Tories been comprehensively outmanoeuvred, the media didn't see it coming. The strident headlines, therefore, are a reflection of their own impotence and ineptitude.

One should recall in all this that, prior to the election, the media had more or less convinced itself that Cameron was a shoe-in – and even yesterday they were convinced that The Boy was going to be in No 10 by close of business.

None of the stupid, vain bastards foresaw the UKIP effect, even though we were writing about itin March and, in fact, coined the expression back in 2005. Even now, despite a full list and an analysis, we are still getting commentators who have not quite understood the scale and reason for The Boy's defeat.

The point about the political commentariat, however, is that it lives in its own bubble, constantly reinforcing its own beliefs and prejudices, talking to itself and rigorously excluding anything it finds uncomfortable or challenging. You will not get accurate or penetrating analysis from this sorry lot – merely the latest "groupthink" as they all rush to tell each other how clever and wonderful they are, huddling together in the belief that the wish is the reality.

Now, every extra day and hour that Brown spends in No 10 is testimony to the failings of the political commentariat, whose capacity for getting it wrong is matched only by "call me Dave" Cameron's incompetence. He will go down in history as one of the most inept and unsuccessful political leaders since Neil Kinnock. Small wonder, they are howling. Short of the capability to understand the world around them, this is their most natural response.

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