Tears of a Sleaze

Ed Balls Contradicts Himself | Terry Smith
Was Historian Hobsbawm an Apologist for Tyranny? | C4 News
Why Did Beeb Bosses Spike Savile Film? | Guardian
Chuka’s Hypocrisy | Mark Reckons
Britons Hate Politicians | David Blunkett
Why Lord Ashcroft is Wrong | Raheem Kassam
El Zombi | Terry Smith
Shapps Attack Poster is Juvenile | Lord Ashcroft
Balls Cheats | The Sun
Ed Will Lose | Dan Hodges
A £10,000 Benefits Cap | ASI

MONDAY, OCTOBER 1, 2012

Tears of a Sleaze

Keith Vaz cuts a lonely figure tonight as his sits deep in contemplation in the bar of the Manchester Radisson. Surrounded by paperwork and an iPad wielding flunky, delegates are keeping their distance as he occasionally barks into his mobile. Guido has been sitting here for thirty minutes watching as the Chairman of the Home Affairs Select Committee massages his temples and stares pensively into the middle distance.
The revelations in today’s Telegraph that the police investigated half-a-million pounds of suspect payments to the Labour MP seem to be sitting heavy. Guido is no expert, but he would hazard a guess from the eyes that Vaz has been crying in the last twenty-four hours. Expecting more bad news tomorrow?

Vote for Me, I’m an Expense Fiddling MP!

The Standard have an interesting scoop this afternoon: a number of shamed expenses-hungry Labour MPs who lost their jobs at the last election are apparently planning comebacks in 2015. Guido is generously offering to run their campaigns free of charge:

• Dawn Butler – Dawn has lived in Brent all her life so she knows the issues that matter to you first hand. In fact, she’s such a dedicated Londoner that she claimed nearly £40,000 of your money for a second home, despite living within ten miles of Westminster! In her spare time Dawn likes to enjoy her “whirlpool” bath paid for by, you guessed it, the taxpayer (allegedly). Vote Dawn – no expense spared for a better Brent!

• Shahid Malik – They say there’s no rest for the wicked, but don’t tell that to Shahid. After a long day helping constituents the Dewsbury through-and-through Labour stalwart likes nothing more than to relax in his massage armchair. You’ve already shown your appreciation, you paid for it! Don’t sit around – vote for Shahid!

• Parmjit Dhanda – George Osborne certainly doesn’t have the experience to get us out of this economic mess, but Parmjit does. He’s a money expert, reportedly managing to get away with sneaking an extra £2,000 in mortgage payments by blaming it on“accounting adjustments”. If that’s the sort of financial nous you think we need in government – vote Dhanda!

Labour’s 2015 intake could really be something special…